Birth Order (and the Father)
Birth order is intriguing. It can give insight to a person’s temperament and tendencies. Why? Because we are each a product of both nature and nurture. Nature being our genetic makeup and nurture being the conditions in how we were raised. The same obviously holds true for our own children. A coworker and I were recently commiserating about how our firstborn sons are the product of our first-time parenting faults. Both of our sons are seniors, and we are praying that we have done our job as parents in a manner acceptable for them to be ready to face the next chapter of life with confidence and virtue. Logan, I love you, and if you’re reading this, thank you for allowing your dad and me to learn by trial, fail by first attempt, and learn through it all. Blaine and Aubrey, I love you too, and if you’re reading this, you’re welcome for having parents who have tried to learn from our mistakes in order to be better for you.
Life really is interesting when you think about how birth order influences the person, and in turn, how the parents are influential in raising their oldest, middle, baby, or only child.
However, there is one area where birth order carries no impact. How can that be? I just spent a couple paragraphs telling you that it did. The one area where birth order carries no weight is in the love of our Father. Whether you are the firstborn, baby, only, or middle child, you are gifted with the love of a Father who knew how to do His job right from the start. He didn’t have to learn along the way. You are in good hands, and you are desired to be in His hands.
God the Father loves perfectly. I have been accused of loving my oldest the most, favoring the youngest, and allowing things to slide with the middle kiddo. I don’t think that these claims are 100% true, but the facts are that my love is not perfect. Nor do I always feel like loving in the way that I should. Love is not a feeling; it is a choice that we must choose to make. Both the distribution and magnitude of our Father’s love are perfect. His love is unceasing and unfailing. No matter our birth order, we are on the receiving end of the Father’s love whose track record of giving it is perfect. The Lord will remember his covenant forever. Psalm 111:5
The Father listens equally. I hope I am an active listener to each one of my children. Although, I have discovered that I have the ability to mute or at least politely ignore “background” noise that does not need my attention. I do wonder if my oldest received the most of my attentiveness, and then it became diluted for each of the kiddos thereafter. In contrast, we have a Father who is always listening. The words that I say to Him are heard with the same clarity as the ones you say. But God did hear and listened to my voice in prayer. Psalm 66:19
The Father is always present. There is no, “Just a minute,” or “I’ll be right there” with our Father. Admittedly, my responses of “Just a minute” to my children have turned into many minutes, many times. Taking the time to be present really matters. I have learned through each child the value of being present. Parenting is a giving of self, and that is where the Father shines with His divine example. The LORD is near to all who call upon him. Psalm 145:18
No matter your birth order, God the Father loves you perfectly. He listens to everyone equally. He is always present. May you be inspired by His example and take comfort in His ways.
Song: Good Good Father