He Will Wait
A common pattern in humans as we face anticipation is that we fidget. Whether it be pacing back-and-forth, or bobbing our leg up and down, we do something with our bodies to try to suppress the rising anxiety, or excitement, in anticipation of something. I think teenagers are exemplary at displaying this human pattern. No matter the class, there is always a student with a restless leg, or an ever-tapping pencil. I myself am guilty of this. I tend to do this when I am overwhelmed. I am torn between focusing on the current class, and worrying over the next assignment or my expanding to-do list. Yes, this pattern is most commonly associated with feelings of anxiety or stress, but it is also associated with waiting. In suspenseful movie scenes, the protagonist may be seen pacing, waiting for some sort of news.
At my high school, we have a Chapel and a small Sacristan team, led by me. Every Friday I take down our Adoration set-up and set up for Monday morning Mass. One Friday afternoon, I had invited my friend to go to Confession with me. In the pew, she sat patiently waiting for the Confessional to open. As she awaited Our Lord, she bobbed her leg. That same afternoon I checked the supply of the Consecrated Hosts in the Tabernacle. The Tabernacle has a key that remains in the slot, and on the key is a keychain. After checking the supply, I walked toward the Confessional. As I bowed before the altar, I saw the keychain swaying, left and right. When I returned to a pew to say my Penance, I saw the keys, still swaying, at the same tempo. Of course, due to my physics class, I understand it was a simple pendulum. But, as I looked at my patient friend, and back at the Tabernacle, I saw the message God was speaking to me: He will wait.
God does not call us to be perfect, He calls us to be fervent. If He wanted perfection, then He would not give us free will, nor would He truly love us. In each new day, and each new hour, He calls us back to Him.
In late September, I attended a retreat called, “Heart Speaks to Heart” which took place at the St. John Paul II Newman Center at ISU. The retreat was filled with opportunities to explore new forms of prayer, sit in silence with Christ, and receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation. I found new forms of prayer that I still practice today, but my biggest take away was the process of Confession. We had sort of “makeshift” Confessionals, due to the great blessing and number of girls that attended, alongside the intact Confessionals in the Chapel. The traditional Confessionals had a small light at the top that signaled when the Confessional was available. For the Confessional in the hall, a small candle was placed outside. When a person went out for Confession, she would take the candle with her for her Confession, then place it back outside at the end. When I entered the hall for my Confession, I took the candle, and sat with it throughout the entirety of my Confession. As I sat in the chair, candle in hand, my hands began to grow warmer. This warmth only grew stronger as the Confession progressed. As I grew closer towards Absolution, the light of my faith grew. My faith was renewed and the light was as well. No matter the circumstances, God will forgive and He will wait.
As we approach this season of Advent, we become the waiters. We must wait patiently for the arrival of Christ. Of course, in our human imperfections we may stray from the mission. We may get distracted and forget what exactly we are waiting for. In my last weeks of school, I must fight through the cloud of busyness and studying. If you are a parent, you must fight through the cloud of planning and shopping. We also have our own individual struggles that may try to cloud our view of the mission, the thing we are waiting for: Christ. As we approach this busy month, remember God’s patience and mercy. Christ is the example to follow and turn back to. I pray for you all this season, and for the new year. When we struggle, remember that He will wait.
------------------------------
Today's Faith Friday was written by daughter and repeat guest writer, Aubrey Tarr. Aubrey is a junior at Central Catholic and patient sister to two big brothers.