Choose Your Battles
So how is your summer routine going? Do you have a routine, or is each day a blank slate, filled with the whimsical freeness of “What are we gonna do today?” Given that this post is read by incredibly competent and fruitful adults, I’m guessing summer is productive, but hopefully there is a hint of freeness in your days.
Part of summer's whimsy for me is taking time to read. You see, I have a desire to read, but I just haven’t figured out how to make it happen regularly. I find too many “other things” to do. That’s my excuse now anyway. Plus, I am gifted/plagued with the ability to fall asleep pretty quickly after reading for some time.
All that to say that one of the books I’m reading this summer is a great book on virtue, The Art of Living by Edward Sri. I’m reading it with a summertime small group, which is full of amazing people, and keeps my reading on task. We are all taking a deep dive into self-reflection as we analyze ourselves from the standpoint of virtue (or lack thereof!). It has been good for me to wrestle with what habits I default to and what new habits I need to sharpen.
The past couple weeks we have delved into the cardinal virtue of prudence. Our small group discussion on choosing “the right thing” and how to choose the right and good has been a big focus. Sometimes choosing the right and good also means choosing your battles. I was reminded of a day years ago when I was choosing which battle to fight:
I got tears. I got glares. I got yelled at. Not just from one child, but two of them.
That was my morning. One kiddo was awake (and alert) at 6am, so I decided to wake the other one up to attend 7am Mass. If both of them had been fast asleep, then I probably wouldn't have fought the battle. I would have accepted defeat and left it out of my hands and in the hands of St. Joseph as they slept a bit longer. But that morning, I chose the battle; after all, it was only half a battle if one kiddo was already awake, right? No, not really. I was the one who "always makes us go to Mass" and "didn't wake me up in enough time to get ready." I was the bad guy.
Do you ever wonder if a battle you choose to fight is truly a battle worth fighting for? How do you know if it is? Sometimes the answer is clear when the battle leads you or someone to greater peace or greater happiness. Sometimes we learn a good lesson in humility when we see that our decision to pursue the battle leads to greater inner turmoil. And sometimes we're too uncertain of the outcome, so we choose not to fight the battle.
Before we choose whether to fight a battle, be sure to check first with the Ultimate Commander.
As St. Luke’s Gospel tells us,
"No disciple is superior to the teacher;
but when fully trained,
every disciple will be like his teacher."
(Luke 6:40)
We are the disciples, and He is the teacher. We can learn from Him and seek His guidance before heading to battle. And when fully trained, I have hope that we'll be sporting a pretty fantastic full armor of God. (Ephesians 6:11)
Sometimes the battles are small, and sometimes the battles are huge. May we fight the battles worth fighting, and may we seek Divine training and receive the Grace we need to do so.